Fortunes Lost and Found: The Ides Have It!



Horoscopes

[For the new readers, this horoscope has 10 signs; plus a general one. The signs are non-exclusives, so one can be Mad Scientist and Construct, or Hero and Mecha.]

With March we get Lent. Read below to see what atonement the Universe requires from you!

Mad Scientists: They have played with your heart, but revenge is not the answer this time around. Practice patience, and keep it for later!

Heroes: Oh! Did you not heed my warning last month? Better be careful when you leave, or you may find a knife between your shoulder blades!

Arch-Nemeses: So you got your laugh? What about trying the hermit life, until they forgive you? (If they ever can!)

Labmates: I would hope you were honest with your fellow labmates, and did no use that vial marked “Love potion” on them! If you did... Beware of side effects! You may have to work overtime to turn them right again!

Constructs: May I suggest reading “Beauty and the Beast” over “The Hunchback of Notre-Dame”? You want to hope, not despair!

Mechas*: Time to steel up again! You may have a burning heart, but with your strength, people expect perfect self-control!

Soldiers: So, what did you say you shouldn’t have? Time to confess to your officers before it’s too late!

Pirates: I worry people hate you even more than before now. I know it goes against your guts, but a few kindly gestures may prevent them being repeatedly punctured later on!

Peasants: No worry for you this time. You toil and suffer all year long under not-always-sane masters; spring is coming, better prepare!

Everyone: No matter if you are the religious kind or not; taking a little time to ask for forgiveness and heal old hurts is never lost.

*Comments came to my ears that some objects to the term “clank” as derogative, and preferred “mecha”; so I have changed the horoscope category accordingly.

Horoscopes for the Month of February

[For the new readers, this horoscope has 10 signs; plus a general one. The signs are non-exclusives, so one can be Mad Scientist and Construct, or Hero and Clank.]

The Northern Hemisphere is now well into winter. Will your heart be warmed up?

Mad Scientists: Beware! Beware! Is the tempter (or temptress) looking at you with ardent eyes want to share your life or to take it? May I suggest working on a mind-reader?

Heroes: Of course you attract passions! Who would not love a charming savior like you? My advice for you: choose the villager over the powerful sweetheart. You will get much more reward for much less risks.

Arch-Nemeses: How bad are you, exactly? Bad enough to fake redemption or submission credibly? If so, you may get a chance as succeeding, at last!

Lab mates: The master will most likely be busy plotting conquest through emotional manipulation; that will give you time to rest. Why not use it to get to know your mates on a more personal level?

Constructs: May I suggest reading “Beauty and the Beast” over “The Hunchback of Notre-Dame”? You want to hope, not despair!

Clanks: If you are lucky, and your creator didn’t give you emotions, you may be the only sane one around. Enjoy it! If you do have emotions... Just be careful who you set your sights on; you do not want to be ordered their destruction.

Soldiers: Yes, the uniform’s prestige always work. But don’t let love come before your duties, and careful what you say in the more... intimate moments. Especially if you don’t want an ad-hoc invasion army to show up at your city’s wall!

Pirates: Scrub up! Whether you genuinely look for love, or just want a better chance at your conquest’s purse, nice appearance and pleasant smell will help you!

Peasants: Be happy. None of the double- and triple-guessing is of importance to you. Just enjoy the butterflies in your stomach, and who knows? You might even get your own hero!

Everyone: Do remember: despite what some singers may say, you also need warmth and food to survive the winter. If you an not quite lucky at heart’s matters, it’s not over!